the proposal

On December 31, 2000 in Philadelphia I kissed Jill at midnight and thought to myself, “I’m going to marry that girl.”  A mere 28 or so months later, on May 10^th 2003, I bought a ring.  We were living in Chicago; I was getting my MBA and Jill was working at the Field Museum.  By the time I had the ring sized and set it was May 20^th and of course, Jill came home unexpectedly from work that day.  She wasn’t feeling well.  When I got the call from the jeweler that the ring was ready to be picked up, Jill asked, “who was that?” “A fax confirmation” flew out of my mouth.  Of course I had no reason to be faxing anything, but thankfully she bought the story.

In the meantime, I had been planting the “friend-from-out-of-town-story.”  My friend Ethan and his wife were visiting Chicago during the weekend of June 6-8 and it would be nice if we could catch up with them for dinner.  They were celebrating their anniversary and staying at the Ritz Carlton.  I certainly wanted to see what a suite at the Ritz looked like, so at some point during their visit, I wanted to swing by their room.  The story of course, was total bs, but thankfully Jill bought this as well.  Ethan is a good friend of mine, so the details of our friendship were all true.  Ethan is also an abstract enough friend that I wasn’t expecting any phone calls to reveal my ruse.

Until showtime, the only people who knew about my plans were my parents.  “Any advice for me?” I asked.  “One knee” my Dad recommended. 

Finally, June 7, 2003 arrived.  I hadn’t been sleeping well, the anticipation was killing me.  I also thought Jill had me figured out.  While I think I’m such a good poker player, and have been reading a remarkable groundbreaking book on nonverbal and emotion communication called “Telling Lies,”  Jill has busted most of my recent surprises.  She was wearing a brand new dress that afternoon, looked stunning and was ready to meet Ethan and his wife EARLY.  It was as if she couldn’t wait to have me propose.  And she is never ready early. 

At 3pm on Saturday June 7, I had not yet eaten lunch, so I mentioned that I was going to go to Potbellies for a sandwich and bring it back, then go for a run (I was wearing my running gear), then we could meet Ethan and his wife at the Ritz at 4:30.  I left the apartment, and sprinted to the Ritz, about a mile away.  I checked in, because of course, there was no Ethan and no Ethan’s wife.  Then I hustled over to a florist and a liquor store for some roses and champagne.  As Murphy promised, the lines were excruciating at each stop. It was closing in on 4pm for my 15 minute “sandwich trip” at this point.  I cabbed it to the deli for my sandwich and sprinted back to the apartment. 

“I don’t think you’ll have time to go for a run, Brian” Jill said when I got back to our place, since we needed to meet Ethan and his wife in 30 minutes.  “Riiighht, but I got a call on my cell phone from Ethan and they’re running late,” I said.  “We met on Michigan avenue and he gave me a room key, so we can just meet them in their room - that’s why it took me so long to get my sandwich.”  Apparently, during the hour I was gone, Jill was busy spilling, breaking, and cleaning things up, so she was less concerned that I was taking so long.  AND, she bought the room key story, which I thought was my biggest hurdle.

I plowed through my sandwich, got in the shower and started figuring out how I was going to get the ring (in my safe for the last several weeks) into my pocket and on that woman’s hand.

When I got out of the shower, Jill asked: “So, what were Ethan and his wife doing all day?”  “Oh no,” I thought.

“We were kind of in a hurry, I didn’t catch everything they were up to” I floundered.  “Maybe they were shopping?” Jill tossed me a bone as she finished putting more nail polish on.  “Right,” I said, wondering what the Professor of psychology had written in his book about covering lies.  So I started laying on the details:  “Actually, they must’ve been shopping, since they had Eddie Bauer and Gap shopping bags and I met them right outside Nordstrom.” 

“I’m sooo caught”  I thought.

So we took the beautiful walk on a perfect day from our apartment across Michigan Avenue to the Watertower place, where the Ritz Carlton is.  I kept pumping her full of meaningless conversation, not at all out of character for me.  “Can we pretend that we’re ultra rich and that we’re not here to see Ethan, but to buy the Ritz hotel chain?” I asked Jill.  This kept us busy for the walk over.

Pretending that I have no idea where the elevator is or where the room is, we make it up to the 20^th floor to the Deluxe Lakeside Suite.

We knock.  Then we ring the doorbell and we listen.  “Do you hear them?” 

“Nope.”  We open the door.

She walked straight to the gorgeous view of the lake and started checking out the sailboats on Lake Michigan.  I couldn’t have asked for a better day.  I had of course, seen the view before and was busy getting the ring out of the camera case I had put it in (so we could take pictures of Ethan and his wife of course).

Jill told me later that on her way to the window she had two thoughts:

1. “That’s so sweet of Ethan to have roses on the table for his wife”
2. “I wonder why she didn’t put them in water?”

But before she could form any more thoughts, she will say that I started grabbing her.  In my version of the story, I took her hand.

I got down on one knee and my absolutely favorite part of the story happened:  she lost her balance.  I knew from her expression, just like I knew when I first asked for her phone number over three years ago, that she would say yes.

“Will you marry me?”

“Yes” and the hugs begin. 

“If I were a betting man,” I said “I’d bet that there is champagne being chilled behind these doors.”  I would’ve won that bet.

We had dinner at a place we’ve enjoyed before, but never as an engaged couple. 

We went to Garrett Ripley's, the local pub where we know everybody.  They asked if we’d like something special to drink.  I had a special Bass Ale and Jill had a special house merlot. Our friends behind the bar picked up the tab and a couple who I caught looking over at the ring bought us some champagne – they wanted to hear the story and get an honest look.

A few drinks and appetizers back at the Ritz lounge until 10pm.  Back in the room in time to see the Navy Pier fireworks.

It was wonderful.